Monday, April 18, 2005

Why Living in the Country is Better Than Living in the City

So I was on MSN, having a discussion with a friend about which was better, living in the city or the country. Since I am clearly right, I would like to take this opportunity to post her arguments, my rebuttal to those arguments, then several other points that makes the country superior.

Her points:

-shopping malls are within walking distance
-more ppl[sic]
-more people[sic] = more guys = more hot guys
-harder to get lost
-less ewy stuff
-you can wear flip-flops on the street

Now, it's clear that these few arguments are rather poor, but I'll rebut each one seperately.

1. "Shopping malls are within walking distance."

I have an interesting vantage point, as a country boy currently living in the city. Where I live here, the nearest shopping mall is about a 20 minute walk away. Where I live in the country, the nearest shopping mall is a 20 minute drive away. Sure, you might argue that it's more environmentally friendly to walk, but if you're patronizing such a paean to consumerism and capitalism as a shopping mall, then you're hardly concerned for things like that. Besides, who likes walking? Driving is far more fun.

2. "More People"

Well, okay, this one is pretty hard to argue with. It's a statistical fact that there are more people in the city than in the country, and if you're looking at population densities then it's a matter of definition. I suppose it could be said that it's a quantity vs. quality issue - people in the country are far more neighbourly and friendly (in my experience) than the average person in the city. But why is the existence of more people an advantage anyways? I don't particularily enjoy crowds; I prefer to have lots of space to myself. Which is hardly ever the case in the city. This line of thinking brings me to her next point:

3. "More people = more guys = more hot guys"

I'm not interested in guys, but you could say the same for girls. It's true that with an increased number of people comes an increased number of attractive ones (of either gender). However, if you look at the average group of friends of a person in the city and a person in the country, you'll see that the size is practically identical. Thus you stand about the same chance of meeting someone attractive whether you live in the city or not.

4. "Harder to get lost"

Not true. Cities are invariably harder to navigate in. And now, with GPS systems becoming common, it's even harder to get lost in the country. Here's an experiment. Take a GPS unit in the city and see how often it actually picks up a satellite. The tall buildings make it very hard to get a signal. In the country, it's nothing but clear skies (and trees, but radio waves pass through them easily). Even a GPS system augmented with an inertial navigation unit will do more good in the country than in the city.

5. "Less ewy stuff"

Now, here, I'm assuming that "ewy" is referring to those substances that are sometimes thought to be gross - dirt, mud, etc. Well, a little mud never hurt anyone. Whereas the "ewy" stuff in cities (hoboes, garbage, etc) have a much larger chance of causing harm. And this may be a matter of personal preference, but I much prefer getting a little mud on me than to be attacked by a hobo or get covered in toxic waste.

6. "You can wear flip-flops on the street"

You can do that in the country too; we do have *paved* roads, much to the amazement of some city folk. But why you would want to do such a thing escapes me entirely.

Well, that about covers that, so I'd like to enumerate some things that make the country a superior place to live:

-clean air
-you can see stars at night
-lots of space
-you can have big lawns! and pools! and other stuff of that nature.
-farm animals are awesome
-I have my own forest. How cool is that?
-as of a couple of months ago, high speed internet is available out where I live, which eliminates the last possible bad point about not living in the city
-You can drive a tractor to the highschool prom and nobody cares
-Bush parties >> indoor parties
-you can set off explosions and nobody will notice
-in the winter, it's almost guaranteed that there will be a hill big enough to sled on, somewhere on your property

I could go on, but I'm sure you'll agree with me when I say that living in a rural area beats living in the city, any day.

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