Thursday, October 07, 2004

Oh My God, She Smells Like Old Crackers.

Before I start off, I had better define what old crackers smell like. You know when you have a box of crackers (usually Ritz crackers), and they get REALLY stale - stale enough that they almost feel soggy, and they crumble apart like nothing? Well, have you ever tasted one of those super-stale crackers? If you haven't, I don't recommend it. If you have, then that taste is like the smell I am talking about.

Anyways, I got to my linear algebra class this morning, sat down, and got my binder out. A couple of minutes before class started, this girl whom I had never seen before comes in and sits down beside me. I thought nothing of it, until she asked me, "Is this CHE 220?". So I was like, "No, this is linear algebra. MAT 185." And that's when I noticed what she smelled like. Old crackers. It's really not a smell that a person should have associated with them. It was quite putrid, and the smell came in waves (basically whenever she moved). Thankfully (or so I thought) she was in the wrong class, and she would therefore soon get up and leave. But no, she stayed. Not only that, but she took down notes too. It was all very strange, and I was going to ask why she was in the wrong class, but my mind was overpowered by the stench. I never knew old crackers could smell so bad. I prayed for the end of the class, when I would finally be outside of the smell range.

But no, it was not to be. You see, I happen to have linear algebra and calculus in the same classroom, one after the other. So naturally I stayed sitting down, and waited for her to get up and leave. But she did not. Why? Who knows. She then asked me what class it was now. "MAT 194," I replied. She then took out her schedule and stared at it. I glanced over, and noticed that neither MAT 185 or MAT 194 were on her schedule. Anywhere. So not only was she taking notes from the wrong class, it was a class that had no relevance at all to whatever she was studying. Yes, she took down the calculus notes too. I was nearly sick from the old cracker smell.

In any case, I have learned an important lesson from all this: never leave an open seat beside you when going to class. For you never know what the person next to you might smell like.

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